Collected Forsooths

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The BEST of FORSOOTHS

Resource for Instructors

Chance News 1 – Chance News 87

May 2005 – August 2012

These Forsooths are listed in chronological order, as submitted.
Link to individual Chance issues for citation details.

Percents

Ambassador Newton: “Well, so far, six candidates out of 6,000 have been killed. That's .001 percent, and it's not at all clear that all of those cases involved the election.”

Chance News 5

“Waiting time for foot surgery down by 500%.”

Chance News 7

Ad for Peperami sausage: “Ingredients: Pork (108%), Pork Fat, Salt, Spices, Glucose, ....”
Company’s response to an inquiry: “The weight of the raw meat going into Peperami exceeds the weight of the end product because the recipe loses moisture, and therefore loses weight, during the fermentation, drying and smoking process.”

Chance News 9

“Four million ... heard it. Ten percent remember it. One percent of those matter. One percent of those do something about it. That's still - he does the math - four people."

Chance News 10

“The current rate of shrinkage [in 2005] they calculate at 8% per decade; at this rate there may be no ice at all during the summer of 2060.”

Chance News 11

“Alcohol is now 49% more affordable than it was in 1978.”

Chance News 13

“The waitress coyly asked if they wanted change of the two twenties Kiley laid down on a thirty-two-dollar tab.
‘No, we’re fine.’
‘That’s a twenty percent tip, Mom.’
‘I’m feeling generous.’"

Chance News 15

“The All England Club said yesterday the men's champion will receive $1.170 million and the women's winner $1.117 million -- a 4 percent increase for both in British currency.”

Chance News 16

“Of the US Fortune 500 companies, 84 percent now have women on their boards: in the UK among the directors of companies in the FTSE 100, only 9 percent are women.”

Chance News 17

Hint: If every FTSE 100 company had 11 board members, one of whom was female, what percent of these companies would have a female board member? What percent of all board members would be women? On the other hand, if 84% of F500 companies had a female board member, and every board had 20 members, what percent of all board members would be women?


“Thursday is the least productive day for finance workers, research has found. The start of the week is the best time with 18 per cent claiming they were most productive on a Monday.”

Chance News 17

“The BBC remains just ahead of commercial radio in the UK, with a 67% share of all listeners compared with 64%.”

Chance News 18

“The number of motorists willing to pay to travel on Britain's roads is falling, a survey out today reveals. More than one in four drivers were will to pay to use city centre roads in 2002, but that figure fell to just 36 per cent in 2005, a study for the RAC said.”

Chance News 20

“The IOC Coordination Commission were told that 80 per cent of the land had already been acquired. London Mayor Ken Livingstone added that he was hoping that, by the time the public enquiry starts at the end of next month, four-fifths of the land would have been acquired.”

Chance News 21

“NOAA's heating degree day forecast for December, January and February projects a 2 percent warmer winter than the 30 year average.”

Chance News 22

”At St John's Wood station alone, the number of CCTV cameras has jumped from 20 to 57, an increase of 300 per cent.”

Chance News 22

“Now 78% of female veterinary medicine students are women, almost a complete turn-around from the previous situation.”

Chance News 22

“Mr. Romney started Bain Capital in 1984 with an initial fund of about $40 million. During the fourteen years he ran it, Bain Capital's investments reportedly earned an annual rate of return of over 100 percent, potentially turning an initial investment of $1 million dollars into more than $14 million by the time he left in 1998.”

Chance News 24

“The car population went up 10 per cent over the 1997-2004 period, while daily car trips more than doubled, rising 23 percent.”

Chance News 24

“The UK has seen an 8000% increase in fake internet banking scams in the past two years, the government's financial watchdog has warned .... The amount stolen is still relatively small but it is set to go up by 90% for the second year running.”

Chance News 24

“We were eleven people obtaining those 30.000 millions. I want the 11% that corresponds to me.”

Chance News 26

"[W]hile the majority of students who enter doctoral programs have the academic ability to complete the degree, on average only 50-60 percent of those who enter doctoral programs in the United States complete their degrees."

Chance News 26

"The Times' leader of 28 February tells us that taking regular doses of certain vitamins 'can actually increase the risk of mortality by five per cent.' Since the ‘risk of mortality' is already 100 percent this is very worrying.”

Chance News 27

“Brian Kelly, the editor of U.S. News, said more than 50 percent of the presidents, provosts and admission deans who were sent the annual survey of colleges’ reputations continued to fill it out. ‘We think the vast majority of presidents and academics are still supporting the survey,’ he said.”

Chance News 27

“In terms of platform use trends among the respondents, 53% cited Windows as their primary technical computing platform, with Linux following closely at 51%.”

Chance News 33

“Clearly, any product with a large user base is going to throw up some problems. Dell, for example, is shipping almost 40m PCs a year, so even if 95% of its users are happy, there could still be 6m or so with significant gripes.”

Chance News 33

“Strokes have tripled in recent years among middle-aged women in the U.S., an alarming trend doctors blame on the obesity epidemic. Nearly 2-percent of women ages 35 to 54 reported suffering a stroke in the most recent federal health survey, from 1999 to 2004. Only about half a percent did in the previous survey, from 1988 to 1994.”

Chance News 34

“USA Today has come out with a new survey: Apparently three out of four people make up 75 percent of the population.”

Chance News 35

A 2008 table showed a student:faculty ratio falling from 10:1 to 8:1 during the period Fall 1998 to Fall 2006, with a stated percent change of -25%.

Chance News 37

“Roughly one-third of all eligible Americans, 64 million people, are not registered to vote. This percentage is even higher for African-Americans (30 percent) and Hispanics (40 percent).”

Chance News 38

“87 percent of registered Georgia voters claim that they are going to participate in the runoff on December 2nd – this in a state where only 67 percent of registered voters turned out for the general election last Tuesday!”

Chance News 41

"In the last five months, according to the Federal Reserve Board, the money supply in the United States has increased by 271 percent. It has almost tripled."

Chance News 46

“France. The state statistics agency estimates that there are 3.8 million employed workers of foreign origin in France, representing 8.4 per cent of the total workforce of 25.4 million.”

Chance News 47

“Duke Energy customers voiced their concerns on Thursday night about a planned 13.5 percent rate increase. Under the plan, people with an average monthly bill of 100 dollars a month would go up about 18 dollars.”

Chance News 54

“The AMA is for Obama’s health plan, but only 29% of doctors belong to the AMA, so 71% are opposed to Obama’s health plan.”

Chance News 54

“I must write again about the misleading adverts by GMPTE in the papers re the Congestion Charge. In their latest round of propaganda they state there will be a 10 per cent increase in bus services. With 10 councils in Greater Manchester this works out at a one percent increase per council. If Stockport’s bus companies run 200 buses in the morning peak, a one per cent increase will give two extra buses; is that what you want?”

Chance News 54

"Two years ago the sausage roll was the number one snack, but is now in second place with 53% of sales."

Chance News 66

"About 21% of American Children will see at least two live-in partners of their mothers by the time they're 15. And an additional 8% will see three or more."

Chance News 68

Factoid: “12%: The percentage higher for searches of the word ‘guacamole’ in Wisconsin than in Pennsylvania.
“5%: The percentage higher for ‘baba ganoush’ searches in Pennsylvania than in Wisconsin.”

Chance News 71

"To win 95 games, the [currently 0-6] Red Sox would have to win 61 percent of their remaining games." [True...but at the start of the season, they would have needed to win 59 percent of their remaining games!]

Chance News 72

"[A] Public Policy Polling survey released Thursday found that Gingrich's favorable rating with GOP voters has dropped 27 points in the last month--from 52 percent to 38 percent."

Chance News 73

Source 1: “[P]eople with gum disease have a 25 percent greater risk of heart disease than those with healthy gums.”
Source 2: “Researchers have found that people with periodontal disease are almost twice as likely to suffer from coronary artery disease as those without periodontal disease.”

Chance News 73

“I think we’re in trouble. …. Look at the difference between the top 1 percent and the bottom 95.”

Chance News 79

News alert (corrected 20 minutes later): "With just under 40 percent of the precincts reporting, Romney was leading with 78 percent of the vote, followed by Gingrich with 31 percent, Rick Santorum with 13 percent and Ron Paul with 7 percent."

Chance News 81

"The New England Common Assessment Program (NECAP) is probably one the most challenging. The NY Regents might be a little bit more challenging; Massachusetts, the MCAS, may also be. But [the NECAP] is in the top 2 or 3% of the most challenging state assessments."

Chance News 84

General quantitative reasoning

“The explanation rests in a mathematical formula created by the baseball analyst Bill James and introduced in the 1980 Baseball Abstract. James determined that the record of a baseball team could be approximated by taking the square of team runs scored and dividing it by the square of team runs scored plus the square of team runs allowed. Because of its similarity to the geometric method for determining the sum of the angles in a right triangle, he called it the Pythagorean theorem.”

Chance News 1

“Q. How many punnets [a small light basket or other container for fruit or vegetables] of strawberries are eaten each day during the Wimbledon tournament? Is it (a) over 8,000, (b) over 9,000 or (c) over 10,000?”

Chance News 7

“In 1996-8 when the number attending university was static, the participation of women was also static, but male participation fell.”

Chance News 7

On the subject of congestion on the London Underground, “last year 976 million of us used the tube.”

Chance News 7

“One primary school in East London has a catchment area of 110 metres.”

Chance News 15

“Fewer names appear in the top 100 than ten years ago.”

Chance News 15

“A Malaysian man was speechless when he received a $218 trillion phone bill and was ordered to pay up within 10 days or face prosecution”

Chance News 16

“To convert kilometres to miles multiply by .6214; kilometres/hour to miles/hour multiply by .6117.”

Chance News 18

“Despite the ceaseless terrorist attacks on the country's infrastructure and particularly the oil industry, the value of the Iraqi dinar has continued to rise-in November, from D1,410 to the dollar to D1,480. That is obviously good for the vast majority of people whose pay comes in dinars.”

Chance News 25

“The population of the USA has topped 300 million for the first time. It reached the figure sometime in October [2006]. It passed the 200 million mark in 1967. The U.S. census bureau, which reports the figure, calculates that, if current trends continue, it is expected to reach 400 billion by 2043.”

Chance News 25

“Britain has been basking in the early onset of spring with temperatures almost twice as warm as the same time last year.”

Chance News 26

“Phew! Twice as warm as Corfu … It's not often we put Corfu in the shade weatherwise, especially at this time of the year. But while the Greek holiday spot could only manage a paltry 8C [46F] yesterday, Britons basked in the sun as temperatures reached 16C [60F] yesterday.”

Chance News 26

In a restroom in the Administration Building of the Arizona State Government complex there is a sign that says: “Everyday each person in this building uses an average of 15 gallons of our

precious water.”

Chance News 28

“[Hanson is the l]argest aggregates producer in the world and 3rd largest in the USA.”

Chance News 29

“Mr Davis was forced out after his division showed flat revenue growth.”

Chance News 30

“Of Italy's 151 Series A players, 52 are non-white, with Inter fielding 19, Juventus 12, AC Milan 13, AS Roma 12 and Udinese 10. Messina has eight.”

Chance 31

"’We're off by a factor of a lot.’--Tony Miller, founder of Carol.com a company that hoped to sell about 200 healthcare policies a month but after eight months sold but a total of 160.”

Chance News 40

“If you do not have so many players, what can you do? There are 95 registered Brazilian players in the Championship League, 94 French players and 45 English players. When you have twice as few players as other countries it is difficult.”

Chance News 40

“Michael Ballack's heart must have skipped a beat for a microsecond.”

Chance News 40

“The RSS [Royal Statistical Society] has global standing. Of its 7000 members, about one in four is drawn from over 50 countries.”

Chance News 41

“Retail sales figures in the US on Wednesday were almost twice as bad as had been expected.”

Chance News 42

“Their visual acuity is only fractionally – not geometrically – better than that of the common primates from which they were engineered.”

Chance News 47

“When do you draw the line? When do you take action to avoid that logarithmic point where things take off exponentially?”

Chance News 47

“With the [CT] state economy in the tank, this is the year of givebacks. .... [S]tate Rep. Terry Backer ... says the general public often is not aware that state legislators earn a base salary of 28,000 dollars per year for a part-time job with a pay rate that has been frozen for nine years.

On principle, Backer says he does not want to give up a day's pay to be in solidarity with the state employee unions. "I would rather take the 40 dollars and donate it to the food pantry in my town than do some baloney solidarity thing," Backer said.”

Chance News 47

“This costs about a billion dollars. I'm not going to say how many zeros after it, but it's a lot.”

Chance News 48

"Connecticut has the 2nd highest incidence of breast cancer in the U.S. Connecticut. DON'T settle for second place!"

Chance News 73

Newspaper report: “Irene's bill in Vermont could top half-billion dollars.”

Headline: “COST: Irene repairs could top 500,000 dollars."

Chance News 77